Saturday, June 12, 2010

Moving Day!

Alright, friends. I'm moving to Word Press so this is my final post here. Please send me an email vegas710 at gmail dot com if you'd like to continue reading. I know that's a pain but I'm hoping it will make some things easier for me.
See you there!
UPDATE: I continued this blog at Playa Minded

Wednesday, June 09, 2010

Question For You

My inlaws have offered to take my children for a week or so. I'm reluctant to be away from them but as my therapy progresses I'm finding it may be necessary. If I have nothing to do I fear I'll fall into deeper depression without my girls here. So I'm wondering, what the hell would you do, at your house, with no children and no work?

Monday, June 07, 2010


The Christian God makes no sense to me. He used to be angry and vengeful and then he had his Son brutally murdered and now it's hunky-dory? Someone told me recently about how she realized that we read into things in the Bible. For instance, it doesn't say that a sacrifice was required *by God* from Cain and Abel. I guess I take that further and combine it with the strong sense I have that the Bible was written by men. I'm not sure I believe much of the Old Testament. So why did Jesus use the Old Testament to present Himself? He had to choose a people who needed a Messiah and who might listen so He chose the Jews. He proceeded to teach them how to live. If I read the words of Jesus alone, I believe the things He said, the parts I understand anyway. But would the Jews have believed if He hadn't gone to the cross? Reading the Old Testament it sounds like they would not have believed if He hadn't been a literal sacrifice.
So what does that mean for me? For all of us? I don't know. The best I can come up with is to live the way He lived and the way He taught us to live. If that happens to coincide with the way Muhammad or Gandhi taught us to live then good. If it coincides with what you believe about how we treat each other regardless of religion or belief in a Higher Power then good.
That's as far as I've come. I don't know where this is taking me.
We rearranged our room yesterday to accommodate my new night stand. As I sorted through books I set a small Message version of the Bible on top of my new night table. Will I open it? I guess we'll see.

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Coping Mechanisms-I haz dem

I guess if I had good coping skills I wouldn't be medicated. Who knows. But I have plenty of bad coping mechanisms. Self-injury, drinking, smoking, drugs if I could get ahold of them, binge eating (if only I could figure out how to purge), and SPENDING. While I was in college, Jt and I broke up for about a year. I racked up thousands in credit card debt just buying crap. I mean, clothes? I don't like buying clothes! Lucky for us, my spending binges include bargain hunting.
So I just came off a little Amazon bender. I got a night table (I really did need one), a fitness ball (recommended by my physical therapist), a great book I'd been eying for the kids (did you know that "eying" was spelled that way? looks weird to me), a new crock pot (I wanted to give mine to Flipper), these kick-ass Keens, my first ever pair:

There was also the graphic novel for The Vampire Lestat and then these arrived today:

The next seasons of Angel and Buffy in graphic novel form!

And the Piez De Resistance:

If we are facebook friends you know that I've been watching this episode of Buffy almost obsessively (hey! another coping mechanism!). This is the soundtrack. The girls and I listened to it already and Elliet and I read along in the lyrics.
Thus ends this period of bingey-type spending.